


Ain't No Sunshine (When She's Gone)

by Arizonacolleen



Series: The Desiverse [2]
Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-03
Packaged: 2019-04-17 16:53:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14193432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arizonacolleen/pseuds/Arizonacolleen
Summary: A sequel to "What a Little Moonlight Can Do"





	1. Chapter 1

Luck is a funny thing. For some people it's a rabbit's foot. For others, it's a number or an article of clothing. Still for others, its a garbage strike. Desi fell eight stories into an abyss of fast food cardboard and banana peels. She laid there, her head resting in a pile of coffee filters, for what must've been an hour. Her shoulder felt... well, wrong, and for a moment, she wondered if this was Hell. _What exactly does brimstone smell like?_ she wondered. 

Finally, she reached up with her left arm and pulled herself up. Sitting up was almost torture, and her midsection burned like nothing she had ever felt before in her life. She threw a leg over the dumpster, and without her other arm to brace herself, fell off the dumpster and onto the pavement. Desi cried out in agony, tears tracing their way down her face. 

She laid on the pavement for a moment, contemplating death. Death would be so encompassing, so perfect. She took a deep breath, and her thoughts settled on the Joker. She saw him, in that moment: the look in his eyes when he stabbed her. She thought of his laughter as she fell. Desi brought both knees up to her chest, forcing herself to a squat before standing. 

She had inexplicably lost a shoe in the fall, and as she stood realized she couldn't put weight on her left ankle. She sniffed once, and began the long walk toward the hospital. Her throat was raw and sore, and she could taste blood in her mouth, but her thoughts remained in one place. _He doesn't trust me._ she wondered, _How do I fix this?_

As she crossed street after street, her pace keeping her moving, her hatred mounted. _This is all Batman's fault._ she thought, _The bastard set me up and then watched as J thought that I betrayed him._ Her eyes were dark, like a spacious room with the lights out. Her pain was immense, and acted to focus her mind in a way she never had before. 

By the time she reached the hospital, she had developed a mantra which played ceaseless in her mind. _I am on a path of destruction. I want pain. I want suffering. I want no one to escape. They cannot kill me, I am dead already._

Batman returned to the scene after delivering the Joker at Arkham. He searched the ground, but found no body. He didn't even find the signs of a body having landed. Puzzled, he inspected the dumpsters. Finding the single shoe, he called Gordon, telling him to check local hospitals. 

Desi sat in a small room with her paper cup of water. She listened intently as the doctors outside gossiped about her.   
"Did you hear how she came in?"   
"She reset her own shoulder. Yeah, right there in admissions."  
"Did you see the clipboard?"  
"I heard the police are on their way to talk to her."

"Hey, can I get you something, maybe for the pain?" A nurse asked Desi. Desi looked blankly at the wall. "I have something for my pain." she responded flatly. The nurse looked sadly at her, "Well, don't worry honey, I'm going to send a doctor in right away about your stomach." She gave a reassuring smile and walked out of the room.

Bullock arrived at admissions, but as the nurse directed him to her room, they both found it empty. Desi stood behind the hospital. Clenching her teeth to muffle the yelp, she bent down to remove her single shoe and began limping barefoot, until she finally collapsed in front a church. 

The light was almost blinding was it streamed in through the windows at the mission. Desi hadn't yet opened her eyes, yet she could see hazes of pinkish yellow through her eyelids. She felt her stomach, and noticed her clothes missing, a large bandage taped to her stomach. 

"You are a lucky young lady." A reassuring voice said. Desi coughed, "That depends on your definition of lucky."   
She opened an eye to spy up at a young black woman, standing over her with a mug in her hand. "I don't know, a knife wound that deep that seems to just miss every major organ seems pretty lucky." Desi tried to sit up, moaning painfully.

"Easy, now." the lady responded, extending an arm to help brace Desi. Desi sat up, "I think lucky is not getting yourself stabbed in the first place." she said sarcastically. The woman handed her the mug of black coffee. The warmth of it felt good on Desi's throat, and she drank it down quickly.

"Then perhaps its a good time to consider another line of work." The woman replied, sitting beside her on the cot, "You're a strong young woman, and pimps rarely fail twice." Desi looked at her while she cleared Desi's hair from her face. _Why does everyone in this town seem to think I'm a prostitute?_ she wondered.

She looked around the shelter at the many women. Some looked better off than her, some looked far worse. "So that's what you do here?" she asked, "You help women out of bad situations?" The nun looked around the room and then turned back to Desi. "We provide direction for those who need it. We hope you'll stay with us." she continued, "Once you are healed, we can arrange for you to be on one of our many work programs." 

Desi cleared her throat, "I have someone. You know, unfinished business and all." She looked down at the cup, "It's complicated." The nun gave her a pitiful look, "Hon, I know you may have feelings for this person but if they're leading you to this..." She placed her hands around Desi's. "It's your pimp, isn't it?" Desi smiled, her eyes wandering, "Not exactly."

Over the next week, Desi stayed at the shelter recuperating. She sat in group therapy across from women, silently thanking herself for not being anything like them. _How horrible it must be to used in such a way?_ she thought. As her bruises and wounds healed, her thoughts long fell on the Joker. 

She imagined him locked up in Arkham, all his wonderful props and makeup taken from him and her rage built. Her heart filled with hope as she laid in her bed imagining freeing him from that place. _Could I really do it?_ she wondered, _That would show him he was wrong about me. I think I could do it, too._ Desi turned over in bed, remembering all the places she stashed weapons and money. When the nuns did rounds the next morning, she was nowhere to be found. 

It had been a week since she stood on that rooftop pleading with him, and the loft had been ripped apart by the police. It was a wreck, every notebook scattered, most things missing completely. Desi wandered into the bedroom, shocked to find the bed still there, almost as it was left. She immediately threw herself into it, smelling around for his scent. She searched like a junkie for anything connected to him. 

Finding nothing, she went to the window where they had made love. There were smears where she had clutched the wall, his makeup on her hands. She stared at it like a mother looks on a headstone, then pulled the second board away to reclaim her pocketknife, a small sketchbook and two large bundles of money. She replaced the board and turned around in the room noticing a small tray knocked under the couch.

Approaching it, she knelt beside the couch and reached under it for the tray. She lit up as the tray emerged to reveal his collection of makeup. She immediately gathered it up, kissing each tube and placing them gingerly into her messenger bag. She looked around the room once again and sighed deeply. 

He was like a ghost, haunting everywhere she looked. He was the echo without voice, he was feeling without touch. It had been a week without him, and she never felt so lost. Her body had no purpose without him to give it, and all her words sounded flat and empty without him to hear them. 

She lingered there for a few moments before snapping out of it, grabbing her bag and heading to the tailors, humming "Ain't no Sunshine" all the way. In the shelter supplied t-shirt and shorts, she looked like anyone, and even the delivery boy failed to notice her as she walked into the tailor's shop. 

She lingered in the back, waiting for all the regulars to leave before approaching the counter with her sketchbook. Flipping to one of her sketches of him, she set the book on the counter. "I need one of.... these." She said, pointing to the picture. She looked up from the book as all the joy washed from the tailor's face. 

"We don't do this." He answered seriously. Desi looked back at the book, then back to him. "This is where this one came from." She said, tapping on the sketch. "Come on, you can make this." The tailor made a cross face and replied, "Look, he's locked up and we don't want to have any part in this."

"Well," Desi started, pulling a large group of bills from her sack, "He's gonna need one soon. So you can let me buy your conscience by commissioning this suit or feed you worry by warning you that I will have to tell him you refused." 

The man looked at Desi for several minutes before taking the money from the counter. Desi smiled and rose from the counter. "It will be ready on Monday." he mumbled. Desi turned quietly on her heels and left the store. 

She hit the sidewalk confident, and checking that off her list, she started walking to Gotham Public Library. _Time to find out about Arkham Asylum._ She thought.


	2. Chapter 2

Desi sat naked in front of the mirror. The hotel room was the sort Spillane wrote about. It was dirty, and even with both lamps on it was dark. Desi looked at his new suit, which hung from the top of the bathroom door. She stood and walked over to it, burying her face in the rich purple fabric. She rubbed her forehead across the breast of the jacket, closing her eyes and trying to imagine him. 

Her expression went sour, and her shoulder's slumped. _Nothing._ She opened her eyes. _Goddamn it._ She thought, sighing loudly. She went back to the small vanity, taking the handkerchief from the suit with her. Sitting down, she lazily unscrewed a tube of the grease paint and waved it below her nose. She closed her eyes and tried desperately for the smell to remind her of him. It wafted around her, a whisper she couldn't understand. 

Sticking the handkerchief in her mouth to hold it, she began squeezing a mixture of the black, red, and white grease paint onto her hand. She pressed her two hands together, creating a sort of lava lamp design of his makeup on her hands. She went to the bed, sat back on it, and held the hands near her face, inhaling deeply. Using her fingertips, she pushed his handkerchief into her mouth, filling it as she stared at his suit.

She laid back, running her hands over her breasts and down her hips to her thighs, leaving little hand prints all over herself. She brought her knees up, letting her legs fall open, and arched her back to keep eye contact with the suit. She let her mind wander to the first night they met, and tried to remember tasting him the first time. She closed her eyes, exploring herself with her hands as she sought desperately to settle on the smell of his hair, the feel of his breath on her neck, or his tongue as it lavished one of her many places.

Almost hopeless, Desi moaned sadly as she continued to stroke gently with no avail. Her escape was tomorrow and yet in seemed decades away. _And what if he doesn't want me?_ she feared, looking up at his suit, hanging silently as if to mock her. She closed her eyes to turned her head, trying to shake loose the worry when outside her window an alarm began sounding loudly. 

A woman began screaming down the alley for help, and Desi's shoulders relaxed. As she heard gunfire resonated and the woman fell silent, relief washed over her. _Oh, thank god._ she thought, _There he is._ Desi threw her head back and moaned softly as the alarm continued. Her body began to tremble, and she pushed the handkerchief out her mouth and she took giant, heaving breaths. 

"I found you." she whispered, and immediately came. "Tell me I'm nothing, I'm nothing, I'm empty." She mumbled, as her hands relaxed and her legs slid down the bed. She rolled over onto her stomach, clutching the handkerchief. "Tomorrow." She whispered, falling into a deep, dreamless sleep. 

Arkham Asylum is bleak, dark, and winding place few would relish a stay in. Most people, however, weren't the Joker. He laid back on his cot smiling wide, throughly impressed with his previous week's activities. _How about that?_ He thought to himself in the darkness, _No sooner do I toss out old Desdemona that a Harlequin lands right in my lap._ He laughed to himself. _What good fortune? Well, I guess I deserve it, I have been such a very bad boy lately._

The guard made his way down the hall, looking in on each patient. The Joker stared at him, smiling as the guards comfort level visibly dropped. As the guard disappeared from sight, the Joker continued, _And to boot, this girl LOVES me! She positively mad about me._ He looked around, _I could really use this to my advantage. Its getting boring around here anyway._ The Joker turned on his side, and etching out a plan, fell asleep. 

As morning found Gotham, The Joker rose and dressed, doing his best to smooth over his hair and look suave. _It's time to charm my way out of here._ he thought to himself. When the guard met him at the cell door, he whistled happily as they walked down the hall towards therapy.

Desi rolled over, peering out the window at the beat up neon light. Suddenly she smiled and kicked happily at the blankets, freeing herself and springing into action. As she bound around the room, she sang to herself, "Today's the day! I'm going to get my..." Desi stopped, momentarily pondering what exactly to call him. "Partner." he said aloud, smiling wide. She collected up her things and headed singing to the shower. 

When the Joker hit the couch, he was smooth as silk. He told Harley about how unfairly he had been brought here, and about all the plans he had for when he got out. "I might even look for that special girl, you know? The one I could share my life with. I always thought that maybe the right girl could heal me." he lied, watching as her heart skipped a beat. 

By the time he left her office, a plan for his escape was inked out, and all he had to do was charm the good doctor a little longer and wait. To be honest, part of him was even enjoying it. He headed to the cafeteria completely in love with life and ready for anything.

Freshly showered, Desi threw on her black pants suit and zipped up her coat. She packed his makeup and suit and headed out the door for a bite to eat. She could hardly wait for nightfall, but she tried very hard to maintain her composure. _I've only got one shot at this_ she told herself, _How many chances does one get to come back from the dead?_ She whistled as she headed down the stairs and out onto the street.

She stopped at the cart on the corner, as she did everyday, and bought herself a gyro. She paid for it and continued walking without accepting her change. This was a daily game she played with the vendor, who was a kind man and worked this corner in the bad part of Gotham, much at his own risk. In turn, she had spread the word anonymously that the Joker's entourage loves his food, and anyone who hurt him would live to regret it.   
In this way, she saved his life. It wasn't as fun as taking one, but he _did_ have good food.

Upon reaching the docks, she walked unnoticed to his cargo compartment. Upon unlocking it, she grabbed the floodlight at the entrance and began walking through his personal armory. She selected a few automatic weapons, and grabbed over a dozen grenades. She grabbed some dynamite and a few knives and began packing everything together, turning the plan over in her mind again and again. She left giddy, explosives in hand, and headed for the outskirts of town and Arkham.

The Joker sat during group activities looking around the room at the other patients of Arkham. _Sweet fucking Christ._ he thought, with utter contempt, _I mean, I may use sanity's escape hatch on occasion, but these people are out of their minds! This is a joke that just isn't funny._ He actually felt relieved as an orderly walked up and informed him that Dr. Quinzel want to speak with him. He stood, ran a hand through his hair and followed the orderly.

When he reached the office, Dr Quinzel turned and thanked the orderly, dismissing him. "You sure about that, Doc?" asked the orderly. Harlene gave a reassuring smile and sid, "Don't worry, we have...an understanding. Don't we, Mr. J?" She turned back to the Joker, who gave a very agreeable nod. The orderly made a face and closed the door. 

As the door closed, Harlene turned to the Joker, suddenly excited. "Okay, I wrote up paperwork to send you to the infirmary. With processing, that should give you like two hours before...anyone even knows you're gone." The Joker stood, smiling, and looked out the window. The sun was setting and Arkham was surrounded by woods. It would be easy to get away.

"Did I do good?" Harlene asked. Joker clutched his chest, "Harley, you did _**amazing**_!" he exclaimed, examining the window and the distance to the ground. It was about a ten foot drop, but there were soft bushes all around the building. As it grew dark around the building, Harlene sent out the paperwork as Joker opened the window and prepared to jump.

Desi parked and made her way through the woods, carrying her supplies strapped to her back. She watched the sun disappear over the tree line, and her confidence grew with the dark. She continued along the wooded area to the side of Arkham. She looked along the side of the building, planning her next move when she saw him. 

Desi's heart stood still. There he was, strattling a windowsill. Desi looked down to the bushes below. She wanted to call out to him, but she didn't dare alert anyone to his escape. She stared in awe. Her perfect vision, sitting in a windowsill, talking to a wom-

Wait a minute. 

_Who the Hell is That?????_ Desi heard screaming in her head. _Wait, wait. There's an explanation._ Desi thought, _I'm sure of it._ She watched as he touched the end of her nose with his finger and she blushed, clutching her face with her hands. He then fell out of the window and into the bushes as she looked down at him from the window.

Desi made tight fists as her eyes remained fixed on the window, even after she disappeared back into the office. _I'm gonna fucking kill her._ She thought, and immediately began to imagine her: hair pulled out in handfuls, teeth knocked out, mutilated beyond recognition. 

Joker stood, brushing leaves way from his jumper. He looked out over the woods, seeking a path when he saw her. Like a ghost in the darkness, Desi emerged, looking up at the window. Her dark eyes slowly traced downward to settled on him.

The Joker did a double take, but she remained standing there, her eyes almost cutting through him. "Desdemona?" he said aloud.


	3. Chapter 3

The Joker walked slowly toward her, almost trying to convince himself she was there. As he approached, Desi's smile grew in intensity, and for a moment she was swept up in the saturating joy of his presence. He stood before her, and she threw her arms around him, kissing his scars over and over again. She pulled herself away, holding his sides at arms length.

"My Desdemona." the Joker said smoothly, "Stubborn as ever. I stab you, you fall off a building, and..." He extended his hands at her, "here you are." He licked his lips and tilted his head toward her, "Couldn't get enough of me, hmm?"

Desi beamed. "I have some things for you." She opened her bag, pulling the tubes out and handing them over. The Joker's eyes lit up and he took the tubes, immediately turning his back to her to apply it. As he worked from memory in the moonlight, Desi continued, "I also had a suit made for you." Desi looked to her hands, "Who was that woman?" she asked. 

Joker turned, his makeup freshly applied. "That...was Harley Quinn." He announced, wiping the excess makeup from his hands to the Arkham jumpsuit. Desi bit her lower lip, "Harlequin. That a name you gave her?" Desi asked pointedly. The Joker laughed, "No! That's her actual name. Can you believe it?" Desi dug her nails into the palms of her hands, "No, I'm finding it pretty unbelievable." she commented.

Joker tilted his head to one side, reading her tone as he approached her. "Now, Desdemona, is it my fault that I keep running into women that take instruction well? If I had known you were around ever corner, Hell, I'd have opened a harem." The Joker turned away scratching his head, "Maybe it isn't too late." he said jokingly.

"I won't share you." Desi said, defiant. The Joker turned back, annoyed. " _You_ won't share _me_?" he asked incredulous, "It seems to me someone needs to learn their place." He grabbed her by her hair and brought her face very near his. "You belong to me. I play with you if I want to, and if I get other toys you will say nothing and be thankful that you're in the toy box to begin with." 

Desi looked up into his eyes. "No, I won't." she responded. He threw her backward and she stumbled but kept her balance. "I didn't crawl out of Hell to 'share' you with some bottle blond cupie doll." The Joker brought his hand to his face, squinting his right eye and waved her toward him. "I love it when you're defiant." he said, his contempt beginning to show, "Reminds me why I put you in Hell in the first place."

"You unbelievable bastard." Desi replied, staring. Joker scoffed, "You can do better than that, can't you?" Desi stormed him, slapping him hard across the face and on his chest. "You two-faced son-of-a-bitch." The Joker exploded with laughter, "Wrong villain." he replied. He reached up, grabbing her hands and pulling them over her head. Desi struggled against him, but her strength was no match for his.

"Yeah, I like it when you get all charged up." The Joker said, leaning into her as he held her arms above her. He pulled her to the ground, lying beside her and holding both her arms above her head with one hand. He slipped the other hand into her pants, feeling around as she wrestled in the bed of fallen leaves. 

"Don't touch me." Desi snarled. The Joker responded by opening her pants and reaching into her panties. A single, hate filled tear ran from her eyes. "I hate you." she spat. The Joker loomed over her, "Shush, shh..." he said, looking into her eyes, "I don't think that's true. I mean, not all of you hates me." He penetrated her with two of his long fingers and looked on as her response betrayed her. 

He released her hands and stroked her hair as she lay there. "That feel good?" he asked quietly. Desi, eyes closed to avoid looking at him, nodded embarrassed. He continued to massage her as he spoke, "She's just some little number. A trick. I needed her, so I used her. That's all." he whispered charmingly. Desi moaned softly.

"Tell me how you've wanted this." The Joker requested, resting a hand on her face. Desi gasped, "It's all I could think about." she admitted, "I couldn't even pleasure myself. It's like walls didn't meet ceilings and faces looked crude and wrong. Nothing seemed right while you were away."

The Joker pulled away and began to removed his jumpsuit. "No, don't go away, please." Desi pleaded, her eyes still closed. She felt around in the leaves for his body until she felt his strong hands grab her pants, pulling them away. Then he was inside her, his body pressed to hers, her clinging to him. 

He brought his face very near hers, their noses resting against each other, but he didn't kiss her. "Are you gonna be good?" he asked, as Desi moaned and kissed his upper arms. She tangled her hands up in his hair. He continued slow steady strokes as he whispered to her, "You not gonna question me again, now are you?"

"No, I won't. Just stay with me. Just stay here with me, please." Desi pleaded, holding tight to him. She began to breath more heavily and as she began to seize up from the intensity of orgasm, his face found hers and he kissed her slowly. Her body curved into his and as he slowed his thrust she held to him.

"Wait." she said breathlessly, "Just stay here for a moment please. Don't leave me yet." He stayed, watching her body respond to his slightest touch as she caught her breath. Her eyes caught his and she smiled wide. "Better than some second-rate doctor, huh?"

The Joker hopped to his feet, and went for the bag which contained his suit. "Well, I don't know yet." he answered, "We'll see." He started dressing as Desi lifted her head. She pulled her pants up as she stood, confused by his response. The Joker buttoned up his shirt and turned to face her. "I think you're gonna like her."

Desi thought she was going to be sick. "What about..." she trailed away, gesturing toward the ground with her hands. She look around, unwilling to accept what had just happened. "A little number?" she said through clenched teeth, "A...trick?" 

Joker shrugged, "Foreplay. Come on, Desdemona, how long do you really think you're going to be able to hold a grudge against me?" Desi shook, rage giving her tunnel vision. "She's as good as dead." Desi threatened, "Believe me." 

The Joker laughed, "Aw, simple, impulsive Desdemona. You really think you're ready to challenge me? You think I won't kill you as you stand?" He laughed harder as she turned and began walking away from him. "You can't kill me. I'm already dead." She replied solemnly. "Oh, come on!" he cried laughingly after her as Arkham's escape alarm sounded. "You forgot your bag!" he mockingly called.

"Keep it." Desi yelled back, "You're a fugitive now, and you'll need it." Entering the clearing, Desi rounded the car she had acquired for the escape. Wiping a single tear from her face, she climbed in at turned the engine over. "That's the thing about _Othello_." She said aloud as she adjusted the mirror, "He dies too." 

 

She walked defiantly into Moroni's kitchen and confronted the few mob bosses that still met there. "In your city, there is a problem." She began. Several of the men gave her lustful looks, and Moroni replied, "I'll bite. What problem?" Desi smiled and walked up to the table, resting her palms flatly on it. "The Joker. Let's face it fellas, you got in water way deeper than you were ready for with that crazy bastard." Gambol cleared his throat from the back of the room. 

"Didn't you use to run with with him?" he asked, still self-conscious from the disfigurement. Desi unzipped her jacket, "I'm under new management." she replied coolly. Moroni shifted, "How exactly do you plan to solve this problem?" 

Desi smiled, "Well, it's obvious, isn't it? I'm gonna kill the Joker." Desi stood there as the men all burst into laughter. She looked at each of them, clearly not getting the joke. "And how...exactly...do you plan to do that?" Moroni asked. Desi's eyes wandered as if remembering something wonderful. "Spoilers." she replied.

She looked at the group of men, who obviously weren't taking her seriously. "It's simple, fellas." she explained, "It's like these glasses." She gestured to the glasses they all had in front of them. "What do you mean?" Gambol asked. Desi shrugged, flirtatious, "Well, naturally, one of them is poisoned." The men all looked at their glasses and back to her. "So if you can figure how in _one day_ I was able to infiltrate your establishment, find an ally that I then protected who could poison you at random then I probably am out of my league." 

The men looked uncomfortably at each other. "Bullshit." Commented Gambol, as another mobster fell from his chair. His mouth began to foam and he seized several times before falling still. Two henchmen ran to him, but were too late. Desi pointed to him, brought her hands to her mouth, and faked a shocked expression. 

Gambol spoke up, "How much do you want to do it?" Desi leaned forward onto the table. "Nothing." She replied. There was a moment of silence, and Desi spoke up, "I'll need guns. Explosives, and some men. Those things are all I need." 

"Goddamn." Moroni said, "You're as crazy as he is." Desi looked around, pondering, "Possibly." she answered, "Never really thought about it. Do we have a deal?" The mobsters all looked at each other. "Yeah." Moroni said, "We got a deal. Whatever you need."


	4. Chapter 4

The Joker began to wonder if he, perhaps, were the impulsive one. He had been walking for hours and was still miles outside Gotham. _You couldn't lie to her in the car maybe?_ he thought, shaking his head. 

He figured after a good burn off, she'd be back. _Women._ he scoffed, _Blow up a few buildings together and the next thing you know they want your name on their ass._ Still, Desi was kind of hot-blooded, and he found himself wondering what she might be doing while he was miles away in the woods.

Desi was in fact busy. It had been a productive night for her. After receiving a staff from Gambol and a few items from Moroni, she set to work welcoming her boy home. She started at the docks, removing every single gun, bullet, and explosive from his cargo storage. Using spray paint, she left a message for him, signed it, and left.

Next stop was each of the many cars he had stored around Gotham. Instead of stealing them, she had her crews simply remove each engine from every one of the cars. It was time consuming, but just imagining the look on his face when he discovered his illustrious collection of paperweights was totally worth it. Desi applied her lipstick and placed a big kiss on the windshield before packing up and leaving. "One stop left tonight, boys." she said.

"So how exactly does this work?" she asked, reclining on the sofa as she watched avidly. "Well, the sensor goes off when he arrives." the thief explained, "We set up a bypass to this intercom system so you can talk through it from your cell phone from anywhere." Desi nodded, absorbing everything. "Then all you gotta do is push this little button." The man continued, "And then..." Desi made jazz hands as her eyes grew wide with excitement. "Boom." she said, laughing.

"Are we all set?" she asked the mob. "Yes ma'am, we're covered." one man replied, nervously. Desi walked around, giving one final glance to the loft she once considered home. A sickened smile can over her and it seemed as though the light in her eyes came back. "Wonderful!" she exclaimed, "You have been most helpful, all of you. Let's go out for breakfast, my treat." she continued, ushering the men out ahead of her. 

"That isn't necessary ma'am." Another thief replied. "Nonsense, we are all equals here, and any advice you have or wisdom I am anxious to learn. And in return, I need some information passed along among friends..." she continued, turning once to look around before closing the door. 

Joker reached the outskirts of town, and headed toward the nearby parking garage. He found his car, pulled the keys from under the seat and settled into the driver's seat. Inserting the key, he turned it over just as her noticed the lipstick imprint on the windshield. He stared at it for a long time without blinking. He then sat up and tried the engine a second time. Nothing.

Joker ran his tongue over his teeth, reached down to pop the hood. Jumping out of the car, he walked quickly to the hood and lifted it the find the engine missing. He stared, stunned, before bursting into fits of laughter. He turned, leaning against the front of the car and bracing himself as he howled. Wiping a tear from his eye he mumbled, "That's my girl." 

He then pulled a crowbar from the backseat of his car and crossed the garage to another car. Breaking out the window, he felt like a second rate hood as he pulled the wires and began stripping them. As the engine turned over, he looked up smiling. _That was your one, Desdemona._ He thought, proud of what he made. He chuckled to himself. and began driving home.

Desi sat in the restaurant, the only female surrounded by the underbelly of fair Gotham. _Wow._ she thought, _Their manners are atrocious._ Shaking her head, he took a sip of her coffee as her phone chirped. Excited, she waved the table to silence, shrugged giddily and opened the phone. From across town, the Joker heard her voice as in filled the loft. 

"You look tired." she purred, as he looked around, knife in hand. "Desi baby?" he asked cautiously, "Where are you?" Desi covered her mouth to muffled laughter. He stalked slowly around the loft, "The cars thing, I gotta admit, it was funny." he said, looking around her her. "You aren't mad?" the intercom asked. 

The Joker crossed into the bedroom, "How could I stay mad at you?" he charmed, "Harley could never pull anything like that off, I see that now." Desi looked across at the boys, all waiting for her reply. "Well, if that's settled, how about you take a shower and I'll make us some dinner." Desi grinned and looked at the boys as she spoke, "Then, maybe after, we could..." she giggled softly, "I've missed you baby. Just thinking of it makes my hands wander." Desi noticed several waitresses listening it, which she waved dismissively toward.

Joker dropped to his knees, checking under the bed for her. "That...sounds like just what I need." he said, looking around puzzled, "But what I really want is a kiss. I'm really not mad, sweetie, so what say we bury the hatchet and make up." His voice was sweet and kind, but his demeanor was anything but as he looked around, his eyes resting on the bathroom door. 

He approached it slowly, licking his lips. Desi took a deep breath. "Ok baby, anything you wa... You know what, that was me two days ago." Desi clicked her tongue, and several of the guys grinned at each other. the Joker looked up, "What?" he asked. Desi leaned in, her mouth ver near the phone, "If you were smart, you never would've made an enemy of me. If you were really smart, you'd run." 

The Joker pushed the door open to the bathroom to find it full of explosives. His eyes wide, he turned and began running. Desi counted to ten and pressed end. The explosion rippled through the streets and could be heard for miles. It rattled the windows of the restaurant, and desi turned to her crew. "Very impressive... Rusty, is it?" she asked. The man nodded, not really looking at her. "Well, good day all." she said happily "What say we meet around 11 tonight?" Desi then turned to the waitress and mouthed the words 'check please.'

""Why are we meeting tonight? I mean, he's dead, right?" Another asked. Desi swallowed her coffee, "Andrew?" she asked, and he nodded, "He isn't dead." she continued unabaited, "That was just to piss him off."  
Desi paid the check and left a fifty on the table as she rose to leave. The group dispersed, and Desi went to rest, feeling victorious but also mildly nervous.

Throwing a large pillar of wood to one side, the Joker emerged. He was covered in soot and looked up to see his building gone. He didn't laugh, he instead cracked his neck and shook the dust out of his hair. He tightened his gloves and began a sort of stumble toward the car. With the messenger bag lost in the building, he was down to his one knife and had no money. 

Making his way to the stolen car, he said to himself, "Desi, Desi, Desi, Desi." she sat down and leaned to start the engine, "Whatever will become of Desi?" he said as he threw the car into gear and began driving to the docks. As he drove, his anger mounted. He imagined her trembling, begging his forgiveness, clinging to him. He thought of the look on her face in the moonlight just the night before. _Sure, she needs to be punished._ he thought, _She's too spirited for her own good. Maybe its time she had some scars._

He arrived at cargo storage feeling better, his mind pregnant with machinations of finding and punishing her. He walked up to the cargo hold, and stopped quickly. The lock was missing. Joker grabbed the door, throwing it open to reveal the cargo hold completely empty. He stood, dumbfounded, as he read her message scrolled on the inside wall. "Alimony is a bitch. -Desi XOXOX" He kicked the tables, and began growling loudly. 

As he yelled his frustrations, Desi crossed glasses with Gambol. She sipped her champagne slowly, looking around the room as he looked at her. "That was a nice job you did this morning." He complimented. Desi smiled, leaning against the pool table. "Well, I had top notch assistance." she tipped her glass to him, "Thank you." 

"That freak was crazy to let a girl like you go." he said, refilling her glass. Desi laughed, "Let's give credit where it's due. He was crazy long before that." She took a large drink, emptying the glass. "I actually have to go. I want to be rested for tonight." Gambol placed a hand on hers, which rested on the pool table. 

"You could sleep here. No safer place in the city." He said smoothly, "That seedy hotel is no place for a lady like you." Desi looked up at him, "Aren't you married?" she replied. Gambol stood straight, "We have an understanding." he responded.

"Well, as flattering as that offer is, I don't do that." Desi said, turning to collect her things. "You might be careful, that's how the Joker got himself in this situation." As she walked to the door. Gambol spoke up, "You could just rest here maybe. You really aren't safe in a cheap hotel in Crime Alley." Desi turned, flashing him a smile. 

"That's noble, but I like my cheap hotel." Desi replied, "It reminds me." She turned to leave. "It reminds you of what?" Gambol asked. "It reminds me not to climb in bed with powerful men." She replied over her shoulder as she walked out the door.


	5. Chapter 5

Desi pulled her new outfit from the bag and examined it. Her freshly showered form glowed in the mirror, and her undergarments seemed almost florescent in the dim light. She felt giddy and feminine as she slipped the emerald green lace and silk slip over her body. It fit perfectly, and she added only a deep purple swing jacket over it, leaving several buttons at both the top and bottom undone. 

She picked her pocketknife, garter belt, and flask off the permanent record of one "Quinzel, Harlene" which rested on her bedside table. Applying her deep red lipstick as she slipped into her Jimmy Choo's, she did a quick turn, checking every angle. She then stepped out to her meeting. 

There was a limousine waiting for her by the door. Desi tried to wave it away as the window rolled down to reveal Moroni waiting. "Didn't take you for the type to wait on a woman." Desi commented. Moroni looked her over, "I don't think of you _as_ a woman." he replied. Desi smiled, "Then you are smarter than most." She replied as the door opened. 

As the limo pulled away, Moroni offered Desi a drink. "Not while I'm working, but thank you." Moroni turned to her and began, "Look, I heard that today went really well." Desi snuggled into her seat smugly. Moroni continued, "I also heard that he wants your face in a jar. Now before you continue as the great white hope, are you sure you can handle this?"

Desi chuckled, "He's that mad, huh? Men. You disfigure a few people together and they expect you to carve their name into your ass." Desi shook her head confused as Moroni stared at her. He fiddled with his zippo, and Desi turned to him. "May I?" she asked. Moroni blankly handed it over.

"Let me explain." Desi said, pulling her pocket knife from her bra. She sparked the zippo and held the blade over the flame as she spoke. "The Joker gave me this." she said, "To use on the first person I ever killed." She waved the flame back and forth over the blade. "Its making a choice, all of it. That's what a man like you will never understand. To you, life is spent avoiding the unpleasant..." 

Desi uncrossed her legs and laid the superheated blade against her inner thigh. Moroni watched, disgusted as Desi closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, "To me, life is spent approaching the unpleasant." Moroni looked away as the knife seared the delicate flesh. "Aren't you at least a little worried he might kill you?" he asked. Desi pulled the blade away and admired the scar, "Didn't stop me last time." she said, handing the zippo back.

When Desi entered the Kitchen, she found nearly twice as many men as she had this morning. Surprised, she walked through the group and hopped up on the table and crossed her legs. "My, my." she said eerily, "A lot of new faces in our group." 

"Why work for someone who will kill us when there's another game in town that treats us like human beings?" one thug asked. Desi smiled, "I quite agree. I find this business impersonal, and it needn't be." One thief stood in the back, "This is bullshit." he yelled angrily, "We're following around some fucking jilted model?" 

There was a hush over the crowd, and several men cut him dirty looks. Desi reclined on her right hand, and brought her left hand up to silence the crowd. "The man is trying to make a point. Let's hear him out." She extended her hand to him, and in doing so make him suddenly self-conscious. "I'm just saying, look at you. You don't even have a purse, how prepared are you in big situations?"

Desi gave a single nod, licking her lips. "Allow me to assure you, everything I need to kill you on me right now."  
The mob shifted as the man quietly sat down. "I'll say." someone replied, and several laughed. Desi sat back up, "Ok, now that we've established that I'm the bell of the ball, let's talk business, hmm?"

A timid younger man stood, his hand raised at the elbow. "Yes?" Desi asked, "Your name is?" The boy looked at his feet, "It's Brian, ma'am." he replied, "I thought you would want to know that a crew is going into the National Bank of Gotham with the Joker tomorrow."

Desi hopped to her feet, and wrapping an arm around Brian, walked him to the front. "Now," she said, sitting on the table beside him, "Just tell us everything you know about this heist." 

 

The next morning the Joker met his anonymous crew. _Is there anything you CAN'T do on Craigslist?_ He wondered as they drove. He loathed everything about this. How humiliating to be pulling a bank heist, but what choice did he have? That may have made him maddest of all. 

He imagined Desi sitting on the floor, clinging to his chest, and wondered how she had the nerve to attack him.  
 _Where did his control go?_ he wondered, _And where is she getting her help?_ His minds wandered for a few seconds. "Moroni." he said aloud.

The van pulled up to the bank and masked men began unloading. As they made their way up the steps to the door, the second man in line grimaced and fell over. Within seconds, each of the men fell around, leaving the Joker standing alone. 

He looked around and the crew, all with bullet holes now seeping fresh blood onto their clothes. He looked up, seeking the shooter, and across the street at the parking garage he saw her. Desi stood watching, her new purple trench blowing in the wind. 

"That's not you're color." The Joker remarked with all the snark he could muster. Desi looked down and back to him. "At least it _belongs_ on a girl." she replied, "The rest of your crew is dead too, and I called the police, so you might want to get a move on." She smiled down at his as his expression grew crestfallen.

"When I get my hands on you, I'm going to cut you into little pieces and leave you in ever freezer in Gotham. Then I'm gonna send your face to Gotham Tonight." he threatened, "Maybe I'll keep a piece of ass as a souvenir." he shouted up, laughing. 

Desi stepped up onto the edge of the balcony so the Joker could see her completely. "You got to catch me first you pansy-ass freak." she shouted, watching his eye twitch at the word. She looked on as he brought his hands up toward her, almost kneading them in his hate. She scoffed, hopped down and disappeared from sight. Sirens bellowed in the distance, and the Joker took off, knowing he too had a score to settle. 

Desi piled in her SUV with her crew, laughing as they stared at her. "Did you see him?" asked one of the guys. "Yeah, I saw him." Desi replied, "Most attention I've ever gotten from him. Not counting the sex, of course." She fanned herself, "That was outstanding." the gang look at each other. "He's gonna kill you for sure." 

Desi massaged her neck with her hand, "Probably." she replied, "But not because he wants to. He'll have to, and that my friends, is revenge." She laid back and closed her eyes as the guys drove. "Head for Arkham." she instructed, "And call the other boys to make sure they have all the supplies."


	6. Chapter 6

It was dusk at Arkham Asylum, and Harlene sat at her desk trying to look over patient records. She couldn't maintain her focus, though, and her mind wandered to the Joker. She rested her chin on her hands and stared out into space, trying to imagine where he was or what he was doing. 

At that moment, there was a slight rumble from across the building, followed in time by several others, each growing in severity. The last of which was right outside her office door. It blew the door clean off its hinges. Herlene dropped behind her desk, immediately frightened, and crawled around to see the entrance. She made it to the window, and spied out to find at least fifty men in masks working. 

Some were passing out weapons, others setting up explosions, and all were taking directions from a someone in the center. As she strained to see, a bomb flew above her head and into her office through the window. Harlene ran out of the office and his the hall as it went off, slamming her against the wall.

The many career criminals housed in Arkham immediately recognized the sound, and became rowdy and difficult. Many were desperate to know just who was escaping. As the main guard went to trip the alarm, only find it not working. As he discovered the phone disconnected, he could hear the main entrance being bombarded. After several heavy impacts, you could hear a sizzling sound and smell hot metal. 

Most guards rallied in the center of the building, hoping to keep out whatever was now welding the hinges off the main door. "Can you believe this?" asked one guard, "Sure, no guns for guards of Arkham. For a kinder, safer Gotham." The other guard replied, "At least we have tasers." As the last hinge fell from the door, in fell into the building, sending many guards scattering away from it. Standing alone in the doorway was Desi.

She walked calmly in, smiling as she addressed the guards. The guards looked at her in disbelief. "What's the matter?" she asked, "Can't be afraid of a girl?" She looked around the crowd, and said aloud, "Wait." The room began filling with her crew, each behind her waiting for command. 

One overzealous guard rushed her, and tased the criminal who jumped in front of her. He criminal fell and the guard stood before her, panicked. Desi licked her lips, tilted her head, and produced a gun. Without saying a word, she shot him. Then she randomly shot another guard. Then another. She continued until there were five dead guards. 

Desi brought her gloves hand to her mouth and cleared her throat. "I don't want to have to do that again," she started, "but I will if you can't be cooperative." She looked around the room, then turned to her next in command. "Help Bob up please, take him to the van." she instructed, "You guys go...let people out. You be sure to tell them who did it now." 

As the boys began separating, she called after them, "Friendly sorts only. Not everybody. Use your judgment." she said happily. She turned back to the guards, "Listen, its about to get ugly in here. If you have some, I don't know, higher calling about getting killed at work then stick around. Otherwise, this is your chance to go. I won't tell anybody if you don't." Desi leaned back, extending a hand toward the door, and watched as nearly all of the guards ran out of the building.

Desi pulled her knife and shouted up into the open air of the Atrium, "I'm looking for a woman. A woman who likes to try on other women's things." She rounded the dark hallway, her shadow looming menacingly ahead of her. "Harley! Haaarrlleeeeyyy!" she called, almost singing, "Come out, come out, wherever you are." 

Harlene pulled herself up and looked for a place to hide as Desi voice echoed in the dark building. "Harley?" Desi continued, "I just need to talk to you a second. You know, gossip between girlfriends." Desi poked her head in each door, looking around for the doctor. 

"Aw, come on, Harley! We have commonality." Desi continued. She looked into one room, and was struck in the head, sending her flying backwards onto her ass. Desi shook it off in time to see Harlene run past her and make her escape. Desi sat up and shot her, clipping her shoulder and knocking her forward off her feet.

"Ach, you bitch." Desi said, rubbing her head as she stood. Herlene lay there, crying hysterically. "You...you shot me." she cried unbelievably. Desi walked over to her. "Well, you fucking hit me in the head." she said, giving Harlene a kick. 

"Come on, let's go." Desi said, lifting her by the shot arm. Harlene went limp, screaming in agony as Desi. "Well, you know, next time don't get yourself shot." Desi replied unsympathetically. She shouted down the hall, and two hoods came running. Handing the all-but-unconscious Harlene to them, she ordered "Take her to the van, and make sure she's good and tied up." 

Desi walked out of the hall and rounded the corner, still rubbing her head. Several inmates lingered, curious to meet the woman who freed them. Desi smiled at each of them, giving special attention to Dr. Johnathan Crane. "It's the least I could do. You really want to thank, than do what you do best, and keep Batman's hands full." she said to the group, "I hope this is the beginning of a helpful co-existence, but if I were you, I'd get out of here before the police show up." 

Desi turned to the Scarecrow, "Dr. Crane, could I interest you in a ride to the city?" she asked, hooking an arm inside him and walking out of Arkham. They loaded into the van together, she checked to make sure everyone was accounted for, and they were gone. It had taken them less time to destroy Arkham that it takes most cops to reach it. 

In fact, it took nearly two hours for Gordon to make his way to Arkham, and then he couldn't believe what he saw. There were whole areas of the building that were blown away, several bodies, and dozens of missing patients. Among them, the most dangerous criminals in Gotham. He stood in horrified awe as he was approached by two patrolmen. "What have we got?" he asked. 

The patrol looked to their notepads, "Sir, it seems this was to abduct a doctor, a Dr. Harlene Quinzel." Gordon grimaced, "Didn't she treat the Joker?" he asked solemnly. The first patrolman spoke up, "Yes sir, but this wasn't the clown. It was a woman."

"A woman?" Gordon asked. "Yes sir, that's the information we received from several sources inside." the patrolman replied. _Great._ Gordon thought. _Either we've got a copycat or she's gone rogue._

Harlene stirred, realizing she was hanging by her arms. It was cold and dark, and her arm throbbed. She had no idea where she was, and she called out, "Hello? Anybody?" in the darkness. There was no reply. She silently cried to herself, wondering what to expect next.

Johnathan Crane adjusted his tie. "Well, you're hospitable, I'll give you that." he said as he threw the Arkham jumper into the trash. Desi smiled wide, "So we have a deal?" she asked. He walked to the desk in the room and began writing a list. Pulling the paper up from the pad, he handed it to her, "It would be my pleasure." 

Desi looked over the ingredients, "And you can have it done by tomorrow?" He looked pensively at her, "As long as I have the ingredients tonight." Desi looked up, focusing on him. "Not a problem at all." She folded the list in half and slipped it into her bra. 

Crane watched her, biting the inside of his cheek slowly, "All this over a criminal who cannot love you anyway?" he asked her. Desi glanced at him, and then let her eyes trail to the floor, really thinking about what he said. "It isn't about love. It's about..." Desi looked back up at him and shrugged. "It's about time he was the hungry one." 

Crane looked her up and down, "Now _that's_ a mind I could wander around in." he said suggestively. Desi leaned in, her lips almost brushing against his. "That's an offer I might take you up on Doctor." she whispered, lifting away from him, "After I'm done, of course."

Crane sighed as Desi refastened her coat, gave him a quick glance, and stepped out of his hotel room and into the night.


	7. Chapter 7

"So, how exactly does this work?" Desi asked. Crane wrapped his long arms around her frame, placing medical tape on her arms and chest. He carefully ran a small piece of tubing along her body, securing it under the tape. "Well, if you make a fist..." He began, opening his palm as he stood behind her, "Then you depress the button here, releasing the agent."

Desi turned back to him. "Clever." she commented, "What _exactly_ will it do to her?" She turned around to face, flexing her arm to insure the tape will hold. He had even been thoughtful enough to tape it under the shoulder straps of the vest. Crane stood, looking at her. "It will encourage the release of panic-inducing chemicals in the brain. For most people, they hallucinate something which frightens them."

Desi nodded her understanding, still checking the tubing. Crane swallowed hard, "Let me." he offered. He stood behind her, running him hands down her back, feeling the tubing and sneaking quick sniffs of her hair. "What scares you?" he asked. Desi looked up from her self examination, "That's an intimate question." she replied.

"I've always thought so." Crane replied. His brought a hand to her face, slowly removing a stray lash from her cheek. "You have trusted me with all this, it would be bad manners to not trust you." Desi started, walking to retrieve her coat. "I guess more than anything else, I fear never again feeling the way he made me feel." 

Crane said nothing as she re-buttoned her coat and turned to replace her shoes. "How do I look?" she asked. Crane sat down at the desk, a chemistry set before him. "You look like a villainess." He replied smoothly, "She should already be scared." Desi smiled wide and went for the door. "I'll be back later, is that alright?" she asked.

Crane had turned back to his work, "I'm looking forward to it." He looked at burners as the fluid began distilling and heard the door close from behind him. He looked at the clear liquid, adjusted his glasses, and began writing onto the hotel stationary. 

 

"I don't know what to tell you." Moroni said, sitting behind his desk. The Joker turned his gaze on him, his eye twitching. "You can tell he, a-hah, how a girl who followed me home from skid row suddenly is in control of a fifty man crew." The Joker licked his lips, his knife in hand as he paced in front of the desk.

Moroni laughed, "She's resourceful, that much is true. You really picked one bitch to piss off." Moroni finished his drink, watching as the Joker turned over thoughts in his mind before speaking. "I mean, she practically blew up Arkham just to get her hands on some doctor." He continued, and the Joker stopped.

"She has Harley Quinn?" The Joker asked. Moroni stared hard at him, "You haven't been watching the news?" Joker straightened his hair, "My television is... in the shop." he mumbled as he continued to pace. Moroni leaned over the desk, "Look, I'm not supposed to know this," he lied, "but she's even made a deal with the Scarecrow. If I were you, I'd try to make peace with her somehow. After the bank heist, no one wants to work with you. I mean, what does she want?"

The Joker looked at him, running his tongue over his back teeth. He growled low, "What she wants is me. She won't bring anyone else into this if she already has Harley." he said, working it out in his head. Moroni cleared him throat, "If there was a time to do it, it'd be now. Its a nightmare on the streets now that she let all those criminals out. The police have their hands full and its not like the Batman can interfere." 

The Joker chuckled, "Yeah, it _is_ chaos out there." His eyes glazed over at the thought of it, and Moroni became uneasy at the sight of it. Just as he was about to speak, the Joker sprang into action. Walking around the desk, he handed Moroni a card. 

"Now you be sure to let me know if she speaks with you." He instructed, looking over Moroni. Moroni took the card, secretly wishing the whole situation would go away. Joker backed out of the room, chuckling to himself, and left the restaurant with a plan beginning to form in his head. 

He missed Desi by one block, as she walked to Moroni's. She skipped along, feeling better by the day. Gotham had been a madhouse the past few days, and it seemed the only people who confidently walked the streets were criminals. She felt confident and mature, a far cry from the flirtatious girl she was with the Joker. 

She entered the restaurant and walked straight back to his office. Opening the door, she found him talking to several 'partners' and crept to the back of the room quietly. Moroni waved her forward, "You might as well come join in." he said, "It is your favorite subject." 

Desi's eyes widened as she made her way to the front, "You guys were talking about interracial homoerotica? How did you know?" She hopped onto the corner of his desk and looked around at the men, all with puzzled expressions. "Words too big?" she asked, shrugged and turned back to Moroni.

A waiter began supplying drinks, and stopped in front of Desi. "Oh, I'll have a Shirley Temple. Lots of cherries." She ordered. He returned with the drink, and Desi placed a cherry between her teeth, absentmindedly wiggling it back and forth as she winked at the boys.

"The Joker came to speak with me today." Moroni informed. Desi looked at him expressionless. "Is he still here?" she asked flatly. Gambol and several buys sat up, uncomfortable. Moroni shifted, "No, of course not." he ejaculated. Desi dropped her shoulders, "Then what's the big deal? You obviously knew he was going to come calling eventually, right?"

Moroni sighed, "Yeah, I figured he would." Desi shrugged knowingly as he continued, "But I'm beginning to have a problem with being in the middle of this." Desi ran a hand through her hair, "You'd rather have enemies of both of us?" she asked, looking directly at him.

"Is that a threat?" Moroni asked, his men slowly approaching the desk. Desi smiled reassuringly, "No, silly. I'm just... wondering if you've thought this through, that's all." Moroni raised a hand to halt his boys without breaking his stare at her.

"He knows about the doctor." Moroni admitted, breaking the silent stare down. Desi blinked, "What did he say?" she asked, leaning in. "Nothing really. You know how he is, he spaced, then chuckled and mentioned a plan." Desi smiled, "That proves everything, doesn't it?" she said, sliding to her feet. 

"What does that prove?" Gambol asked. Desi turned to him, "It proves that I'm still more important." she said happily. She started walking to the door, turned and asked, "She is still in the fridge downstairs?" she asked. Moroni nodded, looking at his desk. 

A smile exploded across her face. "Well, gentleman, duty calls." She gave them all a look before turning to leave. Moroni sat up, "The clown told me to let him know if you showed up." Desi looked nonplussed, "Absolutely." She said, grabbing the door, "Call him." 

Moroni was speechless. "What should I say?" he called as she started to leave. Desi called back, "Tell him I'm the new cancer." and headed for the back of the kitchen.


	8. Chapter 8

Harley was stiff from hanging, and numb from the cold. She began to wonder if she had been left to die. She cried, and her tears stung her cheeks in the cold. She heard something in the darkness, and felt relieved that someone must be there to help her. 

Desi lifted the pin out of the door and pulled the heavy latch to open it. She stepped through the plastic curtain and into freezer. Switching the light on, she approached Harlene, who was momentarily blinded after spending almost two days in the dark. 

Desi stood there, running her tongue over her teeth, watching Harlene balance on her toes to relieve the pressure on her hurt arm. Desi looked at her arm, which was discolored but remarkably well preserved. _Must be the cold._ she thought. Harlene sniffled, but said nothing.

"You might want to have that arm looked at." Desi said to her. Harlene looked at her fleetingly, moving her eyes back to the floor. "What do you want from me?" she asked quietly. Desi reached for her knife, and started at Harlene's top, cutting each piece of her clothing away. 

"I'm getting better at this." Desi said nonchalantly, turning to look into her eyes, "Guess who taught me." Harlene took a panicked breath, "Mr...Mr. J?" Desi smirked, "None other." Harlene shivered as her naked form responded to the cold. 

"Watch out, I don't want to cut you." Desi replied, "Well, by accident." She stepped back and looked over Harlene, who would shiver, lose her balance, and fall on her hurt shoulder causing her to cry out in pain every few minutes. 

"Harley?" Desi waved, "Up here, babe. We got a long way to go yet, come on and look at me." Harlene began to lean to one side, trying to take as much pressure off her injured arm as she could. "Look at Me!" Desi yelled, stunning Harlene still. She looked up at Desi, fear in her eyes.

"Aren't you pretty?" Desi said, "I can see why he picked you." Harlene twisted around to look at Desi as she walked. "Mr. J loves me." she said. Desi laughed out loud, stopping to take a breath. Harlene blinked twice, "He does." she insisted.

"'Mis-tah J'" Desi mocked, "loves Mr. J. Trust me." Desi knelt before Harlene. "Maybe he just doesn't have it for you." Harlene started timidly, "You know, maybe you didn't hit it off." Desi looked up at the woman hanging there rationalizing with her.

She brought her hand to her mouth, stopped for a moment as the words sank in. Then, she quickly swiped three times across Harlene's stomach. Slowly, red lines began to appear, and Harlene cried and rocked back and forth on her toes. 

Rising to her feet, Desi said calmly, "The thing is, loving him..." she brought a hand to Harlene's chest, "It's painful. You gotta be willing to do things..." Desi walked around to her back, tracing criss-crosses with her knife into Harley's back, "things that other people wouldn't do." 

Harlene screamed and bucked from the pain as the fine cuts created a checkerboard on her back and the blood filled creases, pooling slowly in the small of her back. Desi stood admiring her work, "You _really_ think what you have is love?" she asked, amazed. 

Harlene sniffled again, trying to calm herself. "He just needs understanding, I could help him. I could save him." Harlene rambled. Desi's eyes grew wide as she listened. If she hadn't just heard it, she would've never believed it. She walked around to face her, still stunned at her response.

"You really believe all that, don't you?" Desi asked, lowering the hook and allowing Harley to slip to the ground. Harley began breathing heavy from the relief on her shoulders. "Yeah." she replied wearily, "I love him, and I really think I could help him."

Desi stared at her, unsure of what to say. She have never imagined that her rival would be so checked out. Harley just sat there on her destroyed clothes, sore and bleeding. Desi watched her as she felt around for something to cover herself, shivering almost uncontrollably.

"There's just one more thing." Desi said as she approached Harley. She lifted Harley's chin up to meet her gaze, made a fist and sprayed Harley right in the face with fear toxin. Harley coughed and fell backward, gasping for air.

Her vision became rubbery and Desi features grew crude and frightening. She grew to loom over her like a giant and her voice was low, guttural, and booming. Harley hid her face in her hands and began whimpering loudly. "LOOK AT ME!" she heard, as she sat petrified. 

"I said look at me." Desi said calmly. "You may have him now, but only because I gave him to you. If you ever cross me again, or get in my way, they'll never find you. I'll eat your heart myself, do you understand?"

"Yes!" Harley cried, frightened beyond reason. "I won't! I promise!" Desi grinned sadistically. Bending over, she produced an envelope, which she began folding up. "This note is for Commissioner Gordon. Do you understand?" Desi continued, nodding slowly to make her point. 

Harley nodded quickly, looking away. Desi grabbed her chin, "Open up now." she ordered, stuffing the envelope into Harley's mouth and securing it with clear tape. She patted Harley on the cheek as she whimpered, and walked out of the refrigerator, leaving her naked in the darkness. 

She exited the fridge, and turned to the two men which were waiting on her. "Hello guys!" she said merrily, rubbing her gloved hands together. "The woman in there..." she instructed, pointing to the fridge, "She goes to the police department, and she goes as she is. No clothes, understand?" 

The boys looked at each other, "Sure thing, ma'am. Anything else you need." Desi scratched her head, "Make sure she hits the pavement rolling, ok boys? Get some distance when you throw her." 

Later that afternoon, on a busy street in downtown Gotham, a large SUV slowed in front of the police station and a naked woman was thrown, bleeding, onto the sidewalk. On her chest was 'Care of: Jim Gordon' written in permanent ink. Her mouth was taped shut, and she laid in the fetal position crying uncontrollably. 

When the tape was removed, and the note discovered, all the woman would say is "SheJoker. You've gotta protect me from her. She...Joker."


	9. Chapter 9

Desi lay on her stomach, her legs kicked up and crossed at the ankle. She swung them back and forth as she spoke excitedly. "It was amazing. _Exactly_ as you said it would be." She rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling.

Crane continued working from the desk, "Well, we aim to please." he said, scribbling something down as he spoke. Desi slid to the end of the bed, letting her head hang off of it and looking upside down at him. "Do you always work so hard?" she asked. 

Crane set his pen down, "Usually." He removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes, "Then again, I rarely have such...enchanting company. Should we order something for dinner?" Desi made a contemplative face, then sat up. "If you want. I'm going to raid your mini-bar."

The silk slip and stockings made her slide across the bed with ease, and she crawled to the bar as he went for the phone. While he called down and began ordering, Desi peered into the bar, taking stock of the liquors contained therein.

She pulled a small bottle of Hennessey and turned, waving it at Crane. He covered the phone and shook his head. "Nothing for me, thanks." Desi shrugged, and lifted to her feet, the small bottle in her hand. He hung up the phone, "It's going to be an hour or so." he said, "If you don't know what to drink, don't you have a flask?" 

Desi giggled, "Oh, I think not. That's acid, sweetie." Desi pulled the flask from her garter and patted it on its side. "We could disintegrate desk later, if you like."she said excitedly. Crane's eyes widened, and he took the flask, setting it across the room on the dresser.

"You are no fun." Desi remarked, shaking her head. Crane, across the room at the dresser, removed his coat. Desi leaned down to get a good look at his chemistry setup. "So Johnathan, what exactly are you doing with all this?" She sensed him walk up behind her and turned to speak directly to him.

Just then, Crane sprayed her in the face with a clear mist. Desi gasped, and stumbled as he caught her in his arms. "What...was that?" she asked, coughing. Still in his embrace, he replied, "It's ok. It's my new invention. I call it 'Never Fear'." Desi was still woozy, and Crane walked her over toward the bed. 

"How do you feel?" he asked, looking over her face, reading the slightest reaction. "Warm." Desi replied, blinking. He sat her on the bed, and knelt looking over her and studying her reaction. Desi took a deep breath, "I feel...good. Really good, like I could do anything." She looked up at him, and took another deep breath, closing her eyes.

Crane took her wrist in his hands, checking her pulse as she slowly continued to breathe. He looked at her, watching her chest rise and fall, with her head thrown back. "How do you feel about the Joker?" he asked, still feeling her pulse. Desi rolled her head back and forth, moaning softly, "Hmmmm? What about him?" she asked lazily.

Crane stood to look at Desi, who began rubbing her feet against the carpet slowly. He turned to walk to his desk, anxious to write his observations down when he felt a pull keeping him there. Looking down, he saw Desi had a hold on two of the fingers on his left hand. 

She stood, and ran a hand through his hair to his neck, bringing his face to hers. She placed two soft kisses on his lips before plunging her tongue into his mouth. She turned her face around his, probing with her tongue and ruffling his hair with both hands as he slowly brought his hands to her sides. 

She pulled away, and as he kissed her face and neck, she turned and walked him toward the bed. Crane sat back on the bed, and Desi crawled over him, pushing him back onto the bed. She straddled him, and playfully bit her lips as she took his glasses and put them on.

"Lay back." She instructed, and when he did, she pulled her pocket knife from her bra. Crane looked immediately nervous, but Desi smiled and said reassuringly, "Don't worry. I saw this done once, seemed kind of sexy." She then proceeded to cut away each of his buttons, one at a time slowly. 

Crane lay there, growing harder as she rest just above his groin. As she finished removing his buttons, she pushed her hands under the shirt, pulling it apart and exposing his chest. He watched as she leaned down, grinding into his erection and placing soft kisses all over his chest. She traced her tongue up his chest and met him face to face.

Crane began slowly pulling the slip up to her stomach, exposing her thighs and ass. She watched his face, and just as the slip reached her hips she stopped him. She kissed him slowly on the lips, placing her hands on his chest. "Good boy." She said as she pushed herself up and away from his face. 

Still wearing his glasses, she leaned back and began to unfasten his pants. Crane took a deep breath in anticipation. Desi looked up, "My my." she said, "Have I gotten you excited Johnathan?" She slipped his pants down and slowly slid down onto his erect penis.

Desi slid her knees apart, bringing herself down as far as she could and Crane grabbed her hips and began to rock her back and forth over him. Desi leaned forward, resting on her arms and took control, rocking up and down on him. Slow, then quickly, only to slow again as his excitement grew. 

"Johnathan, tell me, did you pull that whole stunt to seduce me?" Desi asked, grinding against him. Crane's eyes gazed over and he eagerly began fondling her breasts as they hovered above him. "No, not exactly." He answered, "But I wasn't going to turn this down, either. Wishful thinking, I guess."

Desi smiled, "Johnathan?" she asked lifting to upright. "Yes?" he moaned in reply. "What scares _you_?" she asked, leaning back as she she moaned. Crane grabbed her thighs and held to them. "Nothing." he replied.

Desi pulled away from him, stopping. "Oh come on, that isn't true." Crane, breathing heavy, threw his head back in frustration. Cool as ice, Desi continued, "Do you want me to keep going?" she purred.

"More than it is possible to describe." He answered, looking up at her. "Then you can tell me. We're friends, aren't we Johnathan?" Desi licked her thumb and began making small circles along the head of his penis. Crane grabbed a pillow, covering his face and moaning into it.

"That feel good? hmmm?" she said, just above a whisper. She stopped altogether and Crane looked up, desperate. "Birds." he replied, "Ok, birds frighten me." Desi crawled along his body, kissing him deeply as she gently guided him back inside her.

"See how good it feels to be honest?" she asked. Crane nodded, holding to her body as she continued to rock back and forth over him. As her orgasm built, she pulled herself upright, arching her back. Crane closed his eyes tightly, gripping her thighs as he came. 

Desi moaned, her orgasm washing over her she watched the look of satisfaction spread across Crane's face. Her whole body seized up, and Crane held to her hips, guiding her down onto the bed and her body went limp. She rested her cheek on his shoulder, and they caught their breath together.

"I really _am_ completely unafraid." Desi said, still in a daze. Crane kissed her forehead, "It's the drug sweetie." he explained, "It's just the drug." Desi lifted, looking at him through her scattered hair. "No, I mean that feeling, I thought it belonged to him." She laid back beside him, "About how long does this stuff last?"

"It should last around 12 hours, give or take." Crane answered, taking his glasses back as Desi giggled, and sitting up. He stood and walked to the desk, "I have to check the formula though. The aphrodisiac quality is nice but not intended." 

Desi stretched, "I don't understand. What aphrodisiac?" she asked, as Crane waved to the bed. Desi stared at him. "You can't be serious." she responded, "You know for a genius..." Crane looked at her, "What?" he asked.

"Johnathan, I wasn't wearing underwear. Do you think I walk around everyday like that?" Crane's eyes wandered as if searching for the right response. Desi hopped to her feet, "Don't answer that." she remarked with a giggle, "I'm gonna go take a shower. Will you gave a knock when the food arrives?"

 

Crane worked on his formula, looking every few minutes at the bed, where Desi lay in a hotel robe sleeping peacefully. He smiled to himself before refocusing on his work. Desi laid there, comfy in the fluffy robe, lost in the best sleep she may have ever gotten. 

Meanwhile, in Crime Alley, word about the woman who employs so many wasn't hard to come by. The Joker found himself standing in front of her sleazy hotel, listening as a falafel vendor went on and on about her generosity. Her generosity with _his_ money. 

The vendor went on nervously about how the lady always gave good tips and about his many children as the Joker stared at him. "And she lives right up there?" he asked the vendor. The vendor nodded sheepishly. The Joker then pulled a knife and stabbed the vendor repeatedly before dropping his body and entering the hotel.

He reached her room and inserted the blood covered key he 'received' from the clerk. Stepping inside, he looked around only to find the place empty. He examined her stolen records and her clothes, spied a sketchbook with several sketches of him and her file on Harlene Quinzel. 

He sat at her table, wondering for a moment where she might be. He then stood, walked to the door, and picked up his gas can. He gave everything a quick splash, and continued to douse everything on his way out of the building. He ignored the cries for help the wounded clerk gave as he threw splashes of gasoline over the counter unto him. 

He lit a match, tossing it onto the counter and leaving the building. By the time he reaches the corner, the entire building as engulfed in flames. The night lit up and smoke filled the sky, and he was gone.


	10. Chapter 10

A gentle breeze swept across Harley's neck and her whole body shivered. It had been a rough night, and the fear that had overtaken her hours before was just starting to subside. She laid there as another gust brushed her shoulders, and she realized that no one had opened the window. 

Suddenly afraid, she turned to see the widow open. The Joker stood outside it on the fire escape, his coat blowing in the wind. Harlene turned to face him, excitement in her eyes. He continued to stand there, looking in on her. After a few minutes of her eyes pleading with him to enter, he stepped through the window and approached her. 

"Harley Quinn. What have they done to my Harley Quinn?" he asked, examining her bandages and taking stock of the damage. " _Your_ Harley, that's right Mr. J." she said, her voice scratchy, "I tried telling her that, but she wouldn't listen." The Joker stroked her hair, drawing the needed information from her. "Sh-sh, just now." He said silkily, "You just tell Mr. J about what you remember." 

Harley searched her mind, hoping for anything which would please the Joker. "She had really nice clothes on." she offered, "Like yours, kind of. There was a slip underneath which looked real pricey." Joker's eyes wandered up as he realized she was still getting her clothes made at Dolce V. 

"That's good, Harley." he praised, "Now don't you worry, I'm gonna take real good care of you, just as soon as I take care of the people who did this to you." He looked her over, making sure to have her attention, "Until then, I need you to be real vague if anyone asks you anything. We can't have the cops getting to her first." he instructed.

"Whatever you say, puddin'." Harley said, as the Joker stifled a cringe at the nomenclature. "I hope you get her, she scared the Hell outta me." Harley continued, snuggling in her blanket, "That girl is crazy, and I oughtta know." The Joker patted her on the head, "Don't worry, if it's one thing I know how to handle, it's crazy."

 

Desi moaned softly, stretching herself awake. To her amazement, she was rested against the shoulder of Jonathan Crane, who dozed lightly beside her. Desi rubbed her eyes, remembering how she stretched out to talk after supper. She didn't remember anything after that, and closed her eyes while she rolled her neck back and forth. 

As she stirred, Crane slowly opened his eyes. He watched quietly as Desi stretched. "Morning." he said, gently touching stray strands of her hair. Desi turned to him, her eyes still heavy. "Yes it is." she replied. She sat up, reached for the remote, and turned on the news.

Turning around, Desi laid on her stomach with her head at the foot of the bed to watch the news. Crane lightly stroked the inside of her calves before capturing one of her feet and kneading it absentmindedly. Desi sighed, "That feels nice." she commented, smiling back at him momentarily. 

"You have lovely feet." Crane replied. Desi tried in vain to wrestle the foot from him before giving in. "Really? Because I've been told they're kind of big." She bashfully tried to cover one foot with the other, burying them into the comforter. 

Crane stood, stretched, and adjusted the waist of his boxers. "They're elegant." He said seriously, placing a kiss at the back of Desi's neck before turning to the bathroom. The faucet came on, but the door remained cracked as the news filled the silence of the room. 

"Oh my god." Desi gasped. Crane called from behind the door, "What is it?" Desi threw her feet off the end of the bed, sitting on the edge. "My seedy hotel is burning down." She called back. "Oh?" Crane responded, "That's nice." Desi threw a look to the door before rolling her eyes and returning them to the television. 

"Apparently it started late last night, but those old building are so full of asbestos and the like that the fire department have decided to let it burn out." Desi read the scrolling information as the door opened and a freshly shaved Dr. Crane breezed in. "Looks like he found you. Good thing you stayed here last night." he said, throwing a shirt on and fastening the cuffs. 

"Moroni must've called him." Desi said, amazed. She stood, threw the robe from her body onto the bed, and stepped into the slip lying on the floor. Pulling it up onto her body, she exclaimed, "Damn it! That means all my clothes are gone again!" Desi paced a small circle at the end of the bed, "That man has ruined more clothing of mine than you can believe."

Crane stood unsympathetic. "Speaking of destroying clothes, you owe me a shirt." He lifted the button-less example, his eyebrows lifted in emphasis. Desi walked over and collected the shirt. She folded it and placed it in the inside pocket of her trench. 

She stood watching the fire footage taken the night before, clouds forming in her eyes. Crane watched as she sat slowly on the end of the bed. "What is it?" he asked. Desi swallowed, "It's Joker. It's time we settled this," she said solemnly, turning to him. "I have to meet him tonight." 

Crane looked about the room, unsure of what to say. "He gonna kill you." he said. Desi laughed, "Yeah, I know." She stood and walked over to him, "It is what it must be." she offered. He looked at her, "Is it a him thing?" he asked. Desi grinned, her eyes shining, "It's a work thing." She assured him. She left the room without saying goodbye, leaving Crane standing there in silence.

Gordon walked the hall of Gotham memorial quickly. He had been informed that Dr. Quinzel was coming out of the panic state she was in when she had been found, and he wanted answers. The torture didn't fit Scarecrow's profile, but the toxin was definitely his. _Could there be an alliance?_ Gordon wondered as he turned a corner.

He approached the room, slowing his pace as a nurse exited the room. She turned to him, closing the chart in her hands. "How's she doing?" he asked. The nurse sighed as Gordon looked into the room where Harlene rested. "She's stable, but she's been through a lot. Go easy on her, ok?" The nurse looked over glasses, glancing at Gordon. He paused for a moment before opening the door and entering the room.

Harlene lay on her side, both her back and stomach bandaged. Gordon approached the bed, sitting down beside it as he started. "Dr. Quinzel?" he asked, "My name is Jim Gordon, I'm the Commissioner of the Police." He look on as she tried to sit up slowly. Seeing her eyes linger on the pitcher on the bedside, he poured her a cup and handed it to her. 

"The pain meds..." she started, "They dry me out." She motioned to the IV beside the bed. She took a sip from the cup slowly, then continued, "Why does the commissioner want to talk to me?" Gordon looked at her confused. "Dr. Quinzel, you do know what happened to you, don't you?" he asked warily.

"Yeah." she answered sadly, "But I mean why the commissioner? Don't you have detectives for this sort of thing?" She set the cup down, wincing as she extended her arm. Gordon reached into his pocket and produced a notepad and pencil, "Actually, I had thought to ask you that." 

She looked at him confused. "We recovered a note when we found you. It was to me personally. Might you know know why, or who sent it?" Gordon flipped through his pad as Harlene made a pained face. Extending his finger to the bed rail in emphasis, he empathized, "I know this is hard."

"She looked like him." Harlene whispered, "Except...except makeup. I thought she was gonna kill me." Harlene took a deep, troubled breath. She looked as though she were gonna cry, but no tears came. Gordon waited patiently as she caught her breath. 

"You said she looks 'him'?" he asked, "Who do you mean exactly?" Harley looked to him, her eyes wide with fear. "The Joker. She dressed like him, and..." She took a panicked breath, "When she..." Harley hugged her sides and dropped her shoulders. "I've never been so afraid in my whole life."

Gordon stood, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Well, you're safe now." Silence filled the room for a few moments, and Gordon saw that she didn't know anything that might help him. She sobbed silently and Gordon replaced his note pad and pencil. "I'll be in touch, ok? Just try to rest now."

Harley lay on her side, mumbling "She's...Joker..." as she took panicked breaths. Gordon looked pitifully at her before quietly walking out of the room. Harlene heard the door close, a small grin spreading over her face. _I did it, Mr. J._ She thought, feeling alive and scared at the same time. _I did good._

"I told you you'd get used to it after a while." the beautician said. Desi handed her her tip, "Guess my pain threshold has gone up." She gave her a smile, collected the few shirt boxes she had and left the store. Desi loved everything about being waxed: the warmth of the wax going on, the anticipation of the forceful pilling away, but most of all, she loved the feeling of her skin as it rubbed smoothly against itself.

Everything about this flew in the face of the person she was a short time ago. She never would've spend $200 on a day at the salon, or wear custom made clothing, and not just because she lacked the money to. Desi laughed to herself, anonymous in the crowd of Gothamites. Desi the arsonist, Desi the Murderer, Desi the girl beside you at the salon.

She entered Dolce V and handed her things to the coat check. She moved to the membership, where a young woman greeted her warmly. "Welcome to Dolce V. Your name please?" Desi smiles sweetly, "The name is Nozi Mova." She replied, as the lady began searching. There was a beep and the woman replied, "Ah, here are you measurements. If you'll follow me, will set you up in a fitting room. Would you like something to drink while you wait?"

Desi followed her, "Um, no thank you." Desi was lead to a corner dressing room, where she immediately began removing her slip and shoes. The door opened and she handed her slip out to the attendant absentmindedly. "I think this time, I'm going to go with something a little less lift, more padding." She said, grabbing her breasts and examining her cleavage, "This bra is great, but I need something slightly more athletic."

"I think it suits you fine." A familiar voice replied. Desi looked up as the Joker met her neck with his knife. "Hi honey." He said, brushing her hair away he walked her backwards to him. "Now, I'm gonna come right out and say it: I think you have some explaining to do." Joker licked his lips, exhaling in gapped, almost pants or excitement.

"Are you in a dress?" she asked, looking at their reflection. The Joker turned to show more of himself, "Do you have any idea how hard it is to get into Dolce V? It's the sort of place a lady makes routine I've found." He puled her hair, exposing her neck as he drug the knife over it slowly, "Don't you agree?"

"Why don't you just do it then?" Desi asked, "I mean, we're alone, you've got me. Let's get this over with." Joker wrapped his other arm around her waist and puled her against him as he began backing out of the dressing room and into the parlor, "I'm not done with you yet." he replied.

The parlor and check in filled with random screams as they watched the Joker pull Desi through the Lobby to the back exit in her underwear. One of the ladies picked up the phone. The Joker pointed the knife at her, "Ah, ah, ah. Now, I wouldn't do that." he said, "This is just a little lover's quarrel." The clerk looked to Desi in desperation.

"No, he's right." Desi assured her, as she put the phone down. "I will, however, need six of these combos." She continued, pointing to her bra and underwear. The clerk stared at her. "Just wrap them up I guess. You have my measurements." Desi said laughingly. The clerk continued staring.

"Um, what...what colors?" she asked desperately. The Joker pulled her to the door. "Black." He replied maniacally, "All black." He said as he pulled her through the door, laughing hysterically.


	11. Chapter 11

The Joker pulled Desi into the alley behind the store. It was private, and almost completely obscured by two other buildings. "Its just like old times, innit?" he asked, lightly tracing the knife over her flesh. "I'm not scared of you." Desi replied flatly, "I'm over it." Joker pushed her away, sending her into the brick back to the store. 

The Joker lit a cigarette, taking a few dramatic puffs while Desi rolled around to her back. "I saw Harley last night. Quite the temper tantrum you had." Joker approached her as her spoke. Desi licked her lips, "How is the little bitch?" she asked.

The Joker chuckled, "Scared of you." Desi nodded, "That can only be a good thing." The Joker continued with the cigarette, "I also heard about you and the bag of straw." he mentioned, releasing the smoke in slow deliberate puffs as he spoke. 

Desi smiled, rolling her eyes pensively as he approached her. The Joker grabbed her wrist and pulled her away from the wall. "Desi, you and me, we have something. And no...henchwoman, no fear monger is gonna come between that." His eyes connected with hers, and Desi replied, "There is something between us. Space. You gave me the universe, and I'm gonna run it. If you wanna stop me, kill me. Simple as that."

The Joker removed his cigarette and put it out on Desi's wrist. He watched her face as she winced in pain. To his bemusement there were no tears, and even the wince was fleeting. He let her go and walked small circles in front on her as she clutched her wrist. "Every time I wanna really hurt you, I think of how much fun the past few weeks have been." Joker said, "We've done a lot of damage, you and I."

Desi smiled, "It was great." Joker began pulling knives from his dress and juggling them to keep his concentration. "The thing about juggling..." Joker explained, "you have to used to the idea of pain if you ever want to be good at it. I mean, even if its pedestrian, same little balls over and over again, you're gonna get hit at some point."

Desi replied, "So what you're saying is, juggling is a lot like fucking you. It feels good to do if you can overlook the wounds." Still juggling, he approached her, his knives coming dangerously close to her. Desi took a deep breath, her back pressed against the wall. "Remember when I told you that you should be scared of me?" he asked, licking his lips.

Desi calmly replied, "I was once, but somewhere between you stabbing me, falling off a building, and you ripping my heart out, I stopped being afraid of you." The Joker swung one of his knives, cutting Desi across the inside of her right breast and tearing open her bra. Desi exhaled slowly but did nothing else.

Joker's eye began to twitch, and he did it again, only to receive no response. He grabbed one knife, letting the others fall to the ground, and carved into her other breast. Desi kept her eyes fixed on his face, refusing to give into his torture. 

He slipped the knife down her torso, making fine cuts into her delicate skin, every few seconds he'd look back up for any reaction. Desi only exhaled slowly, approaching some sort of self assigned zen. "All you can do is try to hurt me and eventually kill me. But I'm not going to give into you." she said calmly. Joker responded by cutting deeply into her inner thigh. 

A single tear fell down Desi cheek, and the Joker spied her burn on the other leg. "What is that?" he asked curiously. Desi turned her thigh outward to display it, "A point I made." she answered, "To Moroni. You know, the criminals in this town are pathetic. You wouldn't believe how many of them tried to talk me out of things just so you wouldn't kill me."

The Joker turned her around and pressed her against the wall. Desi smiled, "A lot of good that would've done, huh? This city needs to be reloaded. At least I made my point." Joker grabbed Desi by the back of her head and slammed her into the brick wall. Blood poured from her nose and her face began to swell around her right eye. Desi saw the blood on the wall and started laughing. The Joker hit her again, but she only howled louder.

Desi reached into her mouth and pulled a wisdom tooth that had been knocked loose against the wall. When she discovered what it was, she touched her temple and said aloud, "Fuck!" The Joker watched her curiously. "Do...you want this?" she asked, extending the tooth to him, "I mean, as a souvenir maybe?" She dropped it, and laughingly slid to the filthy ground.

The Joker stared at her, then grabbed her by her ankles and slid her to the middle of the alley. Desi watched from the ground as he descended on her, a low growl escaping him. "You know, seeing you and all this blood is a real turn on, Desdemona." He turned her over placing her face against the ground. 

Her slowly guided the knife down her back, "Maybe I should just take what I want. What do you think?" Desi rested her swollen face on the pavement, "I think it smells like pot roast out here." she replied, her speech fuzzy. "If you're gonna do something, then do it. Otherwise, please stab me to death. I am getting bored." 

At that moment, two men saw them and started down the alley. "Ma'am, are you all right?" they called. Joker made a face, irritated to be interrupted. As he stood, Desi shouted at them, "This is between us! Mind your own fucking business!" The men stopped dead in their tracks. They looked at Desi, swollen and bleeding on the ground, and the Joker cracked his neck. 

"You heard me, beat it!" Desi shouted. The Joker looked at theme expressionless, knife in hand, licking his lips. Desi brought her arms under her cheek, resting her face. "Well, let's get on with it." she said up to him, "I'm not gonna rape myself."

The Joker turned her over and pointed down at her with the knife. "Let me ask you something." he said, "Would you ever call a guy...puddin'?" Desi stared at him. Bursting into laughter, she replied, "Nooo! No. I think I'd have to slap a bitch over something like _that_." 

"Yeah..." the Joker says, taking a step back, "I wanted to." He continued to back away, and Desi rolled over until she was sitting. Then wearily, she tried to stand. After a few attempts, she stood and faced the Joker. "You don't look good." he commented laughing. Desi shook her head to focus, "Fuck you, you look like a transexual."

"She calls you the _sheJoker_ " Joker said. Desi leaned against the brick wall, just below her blood splatter. "That's nice." Desi mumbled, somewhat in a daze. The Joker ran his tongue over his teeth, then clicked his tongue. 

"I did such a good job on you." the Joker bragged, "It'd be such a shame to kill you over this." He shook his head as if debating something in his head. "I did punish you." he said, pointing at her as he began to pace. Desi nodded understandingly, "Imagine the damage we could do together. _And_ apart." 

The Joker's eyes lit up. "You want _me_ to call a truce?" Desi waved her arms dismissively. "Of course not. But you could alway keep me around...for little errands and such. I mean, look at me. No one's going to think you've gone soft."

The Joker contemplated this for a moment. "It would be fun, tearing this city apart. You turned into quite the disciple of chaos." Desi spit blood onto the sidewalk, "Thanks, teach." she replied hoarsely. Joker turned to her sternly, "Just remember, I may let you tell it, but it is _my_ joke." Desi looked at him thoughtfully, "...and it's funny." she replied.

 

An hour later a soft knock came to the hotel room door. Dr. Crane went to the door and looked through the peephole. He gasped at the sight, and quickly opened the door as Desi fell into the room. Her assorted boxes fell around her and she was bruised and swollen almost beyond recognition.

"Jesus." Crane said, pulling back her trench. "You're bleeding all over." Desi was barely conscious, "We stalemated." she coughed out. Crane picked her up and carried her to the bed, "Are you telling me _he_ looks like this?" He asked. 

"Worse." Desi said, "He's stuck with Harley Quinn."


	12. Chapter 12

Crane peeled the bloody trench from her shoulders, and brought her hands together on her chest. Her eyes were closed and she didn't seem to be responding to his touch at all. Nervously, he asked her, "Desi, are you in any pain?" Desi licked her lips as she stirred, "You know, I wasn't before, but I'm starting to. Must be the Adrenaline wearing off." She brought her hands to her head, "Ugh, Ouch." she said sluggishly. 

Crane stood and walked to his desk. He pulled a syringe and inserted it into a glass bottle filled with clear liquid. "Desi, I'm going to give you something for the pain, ok? But first I'm gonna need you to talk to me a bit so I can see how lucid you are." 

Desi coughed and replied, "My name is Desi and I am lying here. I am lying here and my name is Desi. The Joker hit me in the face with a building. Now I'm lying here, and my name is Desi." She laughed quietly to herself as Crane sat on the edge of the bed. He tied off her arm and searched for a vein. Slowly inserting the needle, he watched as Desi's brow furrowed at the sensation. 

He depressed the plunger slowly, and all expression slowly faded from Desi's face. Her body relaxed and she was still. Crane removed the strap from her arm and looked at her, taking stock of all the damage. "Listen." he said, running a hand through her hair, "I don't have the supplies to take care of all this. I need to go to a pharmacy." He stood, still looking her over, "You're gonna be ok. I'll be right back." He grabbed his coat and left as she dozed softly. 

She hadn't moved while he was gone, and Crane began arranging all the materials he had picked up on the bedside table. He walked to the bathroom, rolling up his sleeves, and returned with a small tub of warm water. He soaked a sponge in the water, and began to lightly pat along Desi's stomach, removing dirt and small pieces of gravel from her wounds. He turned her hands over and noticed the burn of her wrist.

Her face was the worst, where even in her drug-induced slumber she would wince at his touch. He worked to remove the blood from her hair and then began to carefully brush iodine over each opening. Once each cut and abrasion was cleaned, he stitched each large gash and ran a thin layer of neosporin over each one before covering it with gauze. 

By the time he was finished taping each piece down, Desi looked like a half-dressed mummy. Crane looked at her, a fire growing inside of him. He checked her pupils and her pulse, then collected his mask and a few vials of his toxin and left the room.

 

The next morning, Desi awoke with a jolt as Crane lifted her head. "It's all right." he offered, "Here, take this." He had pills and a cup of water waiting for her, "Its for your swelling." Desi took them and pulled herself up to a sit. "Easy." Crane instructed. 

Desi blinked twice and looked around. "What time is it?" she asked. Crane examined his watch, "It's ten." he answered, "Why, what's wrong?" Desi wrestled to her feet, looking around for her clothes. "I need a shower." she said, "I gotta go to work."

Crane stared at her. "We took care of the shower last night, and the only thing you need to do is come back to bed and recuperate." Desi found her trench and looked at it frightfully. "No, I really have to work. What the hell am I gonna wear?" She looked around and noticed the bags she had brought home.

Crane leaned toward her on the bed, "Have you seen yourself?" He asked, as she rummaged through the bag and lifted a new outfit. "You need to get better. Come back to bed." Desi looked up, her back to him. Turing slowly to face him, she responded sweetly, "I look awful, huh?"

Crane stammered, "Well, you've seen better days." Desi walked over to him, now in her new bra and panties. Standing between his legs, she pulled his head to her stomach, stroking his hair. "You want to nurse me back to health?" Crane sighed, "Well, someone needs to, and you aren't going to." 

Desi lifted his gaze to meet hers, "That is so sexy." She bent down and kissed him passionately on the lips. A kiss that continued for several minutes, until it was interrupted by a knock at the door. Desi lifted, "Dammnit, I'm late." she said, rushing to the door.

She opened it, and the Joker stepped in. "You're not ready yet?" he demanded, turning the Crane, "Women. Nothing but trouble." Desi walked back to her outfit, "I'm coming, I'm coming." she said. The Joker looked around, "Well, Desdemona, aren't you a sight for sore..." 

Desi pointed at him, "Don't say it." she ordered. The Joker shrugged, and they both laughed. Crane looked at Desi. "You're working with _him_?" he asked. Desi nodded, unsure of the miscommunication. The Joker stepped in, "We're fine now. Really." he assured him.

Desi finished dressing and turned to Crane, placing her hands on his shoulders. "It's just business, and I'll be fine." She assured him, looking into his eyes. "You trust me, don't you Johnathan?" Crane rolled his eyes and gave her a little nod. She pulled him to her, bringing her mouth to his ear. "I'll make it up to you. Anything you want when I get back." She pulled back to look in his eyes, " _Anything._ "

She turned and headed out the door. The Joker waved, "Bye, Johnathan." he added as he headed out with her. The walked down the hall with their matching outfits toward the elevator. " _Johnathan._ " Joker mocked. Desi punched him in his arm, "Shut up." 

"Seriously, you have feelings for a guy like that?" The Joker asked, tilting toward Desi for her response. Desi pushed the lobby button and smiled, "So how is Harley Quinn?" she responded as the doors closed.

 

Moroni turned his glass, watching the ice cubes move around. His office was ground zero, and rumors of the Joker having killed Desi were topic of the day. "Don't get me wrong, she was nice to look at, but she brought this on herself." He said, addressing the group, "Who among us didn't warn her?"

Gambol sat up in his chair, "We need to know what she told him about us and our involvement. She's dead, it's our asses we need to be covering." Several guys in the room sounded their agreement.

Just then the door opened. "Knock knock!" Desi said joyfully as she walked in. Everyone turned to her, staring at her battered appearance. "You're alive?" Moroni asked. Desi looked curiously at him. "Of course she is." The Joker responded, following her in.

The crowd stood silent as they made their way to the center of the room. "We just wanted to let you guys know that..." Desi turned to the Joker, "we've made up." The Joker playfully nudged her chin with his fist. He turned to the group, "I mean, we where trying to kill each other, and that's not very fair."

Desi shook her head as he continued, "There's so many more people in Gotham. It was selfish us us." Desi nodded, "It was. But..." she said, a smile spreading across her face, "J and I are gonna play nice now, and we don't have any hard feelings." Joker threw an arm around her shoulder, pulling her to him. 

"Honestly, if she wants to waste her time with a pencil-thin bookworm instead of a real criminal, that's fine by me." he said laughingly. "And if he wants to ruin his life with a bottle-blond, air-headed, cupie doll..." She touched the end of his nose, "Whatever makes you happy."

The crowd stared at them, speechless. Desi continued, "We just wanted to thank you for all the stuff. You know, we really appreciate it and all." The Joker nodded, "We appreciate it so much, we're not even going retaliate for you helping both of us against each other." Both turned to each other, laughing.

Joker said jovially, "Come on Desi, let's get out of their hair. Some guys just don't know when to quit working." He gave a happy wave as Moroni pulled Maalox from his desk. He took a large drink of it straight from the bottle as they closed the door behind them.

Hitting the street, Desi hopped up and down out of excitement as the Joker watched. "You're gonna pop a stitch." Joker said dryly. Desi stopped, looking around at herself. _Damn, what all did that man do while I was out last night?_ she wondered.

Desi grabbed Joker by the hand and pulled him down the street to the garage. They entered it and she skipped down to the basement. Joker followed her down into the poorly lit and cave-like area. She went ahead of him and into the darkness. Joker laughed softly to himself as he looked around in the dark.

Desi jumped him as he rounded the corner, wrapping her arms around him. She kissed him all over his face, giggling as she did it. "Did that get you as hot as it did me?" she asked, continuing to kiss him. He pulled away her gauze, making her yelp slightly as he found her mouth.

He kissed her passionately, nibbling on her lip as she pulled away. She dropped to her knees and ducked into his coat, opening his fly and feeling his erection. He stood there in the dark, watching people unknowingly pass him as Desi hungrily took him into her mouth.

She was voracious, mixing long thoughtful strokes with light grazes of her teeth along his shaft. She moved back and forth, almost completely obscured by his coat. She could barely hear him over street noise from above, but as she gripped his legs, she felt him rock back and forth before going rigid. 

She continued to suck, abandoning gentle as she felt him grab her head and pull her hair. He came violently, filling her mouth with his warm, salty ejaculate. She rolled back onto her feet, looking up at him. His eyes were closed, still enjoying the orgasm.

Desi sprung to her feet and grabbed his coat, pulling him into the service elevator. "Oh, no. I'm not done with you yet." she cried, as they both fell into the elevator. She pressed the door close button as he rushed her body, his hands slipping over her breasts. 

As the doors closed, Desi pressed the emergency stop and turned to him. He buried his face in her neck, sucking and biting playfully. "She'll never be me you know." Desi whispered in his ear. Joker responded by pushing her into the corner and pulling her underwear away from her.

Their eyes locked as he thrust roughly into her. He slammed her against the wall of the elevator as she pulled at his clothes, tugging them away from his shoulders. She wrapped her hands around his face, sliding them up into his hair as he continued slamming into her.

She stripped him down to his vest and he grabbed her arms, lacing his fingers into hers and extending them over her head. He kissed her again and as he pulled away she cried, "Harder."   
He untangled their fingers and grabbed her by her ass. He then brought her to the floor of the elevator, his strokes now shorter and more violent.

He began grunting, almost animalistic, and he placed his hands on either side of her face. Desi opened her mouth, accepting his thumb, which she playfully bit and sucked on. Desi began to uncontrollably buck, her body seeking an almost mammalian pull to his.

She threw her head back and moaned loudly. As she brought her head back, their stares met. Neither looked away, and their shared orgasm nearly rocked the elevator. He lifted from her, trying to catch his breath. She lay there for a second, her every breath hinting at a moan.

She stood, brushed herself off, and brushed by him as she released the stop and pressed the ground floor button. Moments later, the elevator opened on two completely dressed and put together adults. Desi grinned, "So, Tuesday?" she asked. The Joker stepped off the elevator, "I'll call you." he replied. 

 

Gordon walked into Major Case and approached Bullock's desk. Bullock handed him the letter, in its police evidence bag. "Anything?" Gordan asked. Bullock shook his head, "Nothing. No prints, no DNA, other that the victim's." Gordon turned the paper over, rereading it with a solemn look on his face.

 

> **
> 
> Dear Commissioner,  
> This city is in need of tenacious women. I've been shown that, and I'm a fast study. The Joker is more than a criminal or a genius, he's a trend setter. This skirted disciple will make him proud. Expect this chaotician to spark the trend. 
> 
> Yours in opposition, Desdemona 
> 
> **


End file.
